I don’t know if anyone here has been through this… but I eat a lot of fast food because I have a fear of using anything to cook, if it’s for me to make something like bread and butter, that’s fine, it’s just a fork that I need, but when it comes to using a furnace or those kind of things, I just have a fear I might mess up somehow and start a fire or something… I know it sounds stupid but it’s a nightmare I have in my head for some reason =/, I thought I’d try getting over it so I could cook my own meals and get more healthy but thar’s a barrier stopping me… can anyone who has been through this give me any advice on it?
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Maybe start with more simple things? What I feel is simple is like oatmeal or pasta.
Maybe take a cooking class? They can teach you how to do things so it won’t be as scary.
My wife suggested watching a lot of cooking YouTube videos.
Salads, sandwiches, wraps, ramen (using an electric kettle to boil water).
If OP has a fear of fire, a rice cooker, or crock pot, or instapot, or air fryer, or panini press can do so much without ever having to see flames.
get a rice cooker.
One button. super safe. easy to clean.
there are recipe books about how to use a rice cooker to cook all sorts of stuff (rice, curries, hot pot, soups, pasta, steamed anything)
with that same one button.
after you get comfortable heating up food so that you can eat it, you can try a pan or a Crock-Pot, whatever strikes your fancy.
Agreed. Rice cookers and slow cookers are gateway appliances. You’ll get sous chef prep practice and results with very low risk of failure.
Might be worth picking up some fire safety equipment if that might give you some peace of mind and reduce that barrier a little. Not talking about parking a shiny red fire truck in your driveway but a small kitchen fire extinguisher shouldn’t be too hard to come by. There are also stovetop extinguisher canisters that go off automatically when exposed to intense heat (fine for normal cooking but intended to be activated by an uncontrolled fire).
If you haven’t seen it already, I’d also recommend watching a video or two about how to control grease fires. Reading about it is one thing but seeing the demonstration of why not to use water really drives the point home. Scary for sure but the other side of it is that you learn how to handle one of the worst-case scenarios so it can be a confidence boost moving forward.
Also as far as cooking hardware, glass-top stoves are very difficult to start fires on, and induction cooktops are even more, at least for stuff like boilovers and spilled food.
I’d also suggest taking some sort of cooking class, many community colleges have classes that you can take at night, and there are several businesses that offer classes as well. Getting used to the tools and techniques in a supervised environment can go a long way for confidence at home.
I just have a fear I might mess up somehow and start a fire or something
It takes some effort to start a fire. Most oils flash points are >600 F, which you might get a pan to to sear a steak, but to heat a pan of oil for deepfrying or something to >600 F, which would be a dangerous situation, requires you to continue heating it after it started billowing smoke between ~350F and ~525.
In any case, if you manage to have an oil fire, say by spilling some on the burner, just let it burn out if it’s a small amount or turn off the heat and throw a towel over it if it’s like a cup’s worth.
Minor burns aren’t uncommon when you’re learning, but that’s just a very quick way to learn “wrap the handle of the cast iron you just took out of the oven with a towel so you don’t grab it like a moron” or “use tongs to place things on hot oil so it doesn’t splatter on your hand”
Convenience appliances? You can do a lot with a microwave oven, air fryer and coffee maker, without any flame, or really any exposed hot surfaces
I am a software engineer by trade, so when I started cooking, everything and every tool was intimidating, because I had no idea how it worked nor what it was meant for. I knew nothing about knives besides not to drop one, didn’t know the difference between a wok and a skillet, and didn’t understand how oil creates a non-stick surface on a non-non-stick pan.
What helped me was a book that wasn’t like a recipe or cook book, but something closer to a food and kitchen textbook. The Food Lab by Kenji Lopez-Alt goes into some excruciatingly scientific detail about the role of different kitchen implements, and then showcasing recipes that apply theory to practice. Each step in the recipes thoroughly describe what to do, and the author puts a lot of content onto his YouTube channel as well.
It was this book that convinced me to buy, strip, and season a cast iron pan, which has already proven its worth as a non-sticking vessel comparable to my old Teflon-coated pans. And I think for you, reading the theory and following some of the recipes might develop sufficient experience to at least be comfortable in an active kitchen. It’s very much a chicken-and-egg problem – if you’ll pardon the poultry pun – but this book might be enough to make progress in the kitchen.
Also, since it was published in 2015, it’s very likely available at your local library, so check there first before spending money to buy the book. Good luck with your culinary development!
Step 1 - burn the house down with gasoline.
There is no step 2.
Now whenever you cook, no matter what you do, no matter how badly you fail, it’ll never be as bad as the time yoj caused a house fire, which resulted in several houses catching fire.
Take a cooking class. Learn how to manage a kitchen fire with a fire blanket or extinguisher and get one of each. Start practicing. You’ll burn stuff and make food that’s no good but you’ll get better. Start simple with stuff like pasta.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fQBUu3J2USA
Kitchen fires are scarier than they are difficult to deal with, if you are prepared and remain calm. You can see in this video how quickly and easily you can contain and extinguish the fire with just a baking sheet or a metal pot lid or just another pan. The real trouble happens when people panic or respond to the fire improperly, like splashing water onto it. It’s also smart to keep a small fire extinguisher in your kitchen, just in case.
There is also a lot of food that you can cook that will have little to no risk of causing a fire (soup, curry, rice, pasta, braised meats, steamed vegetables, pretty much anything that is wet or contains a lot of water or is cooked with water/steam), although if you keep your kitchen clean and tidy, and use your stove burners on appropriate levels, there should be little risk of a fire anyway.
I’ve started a fire in the kitchen. Not by messing up, but by using a toaster built in the 1950s and designed to toast bread as a secondary function to killing you. It was thirty seconds of horror, and then things were okay. The toast was in the sink under a stream of water and the toaster was unplugged.
It’s important to realise that even if a fear comes true, things will be okay. Get a kitchen-suitable fire extinguisher. Learn to use it. Don’t use death as an ingredient like I did. Understand that even if things go wrong, you’ll fix it. Your ability to deal with shit is bigger than the shit you have to deal with.
I have not, but why not start by helping someone else cook, or inviting someone over to help you cook?
It does sound like an unhealthy obsession not an actual cooking problem but if it’s more like you just never did it and have built it up in your head, perhaps taking small steps and seeing that your fears are not fulfilled will deflate them.
I agree you don’t necessarily need to cook, assembling can go a long way, but if you want to cook that is a very good reason to cook!
I will say - as an experienced home cook, shit does (rarely) happen so maybe also taking a kitchen safety class and getting fire suppression equipment would help, practicing what to do if something does happen so you don’t panic at a small fire and let it become a big fire when it would have been easy to put it out.
I would wonder if you felt the same about driving? I’m betting that part of it is that you don’t know how to react in a bind. That’s practice and training more than anything.
Try this: Go watch some kitchen safety how videos. Go by some boxed Mac and cheese. Make it, it’s foolproof.
Notice that everything turned out ok. Try it again a few times. Now go try something different that you might like.Get a fire extinguisher. Keep it in your kitchen in a designated spot.
Start small. Learn to make ramen, mac and cheese, eggs.
Get practice before you start leaving the stove unattended. Have timers. Activate the hood fan. Learn to keep an eye on things. Don’t start other activities you can’t drop in a moment (like an online game) while cooking.
When you finish something, turn it off BEFORE taking it off/out. Double check.
If you have the features, learn how the timer system of your appliances works. My family has never figured them out and screws stuff up regularly because of inattention. I'm disabled and I know better than to trust myself. I set timers to start and stop stuff that is cooking in the oven. If I want something hot at a special time, I just set a delay timer that turns on my settings and then has a stop timer. If there is absolutely any doubt that a dish in the oven may leak, I place a pan on another lower rack to catch absolutely anything that might potentially leak. I tend to cook 2 weeks worth of food at one time in the oven and just arrange all the stuff so that the potential leaks are onto other safe stuff.
I also do not bother with recipes. Most ovens have terrible temperature controllers, so times and settings are largely useless in reality. My secret is to start with boring but edible food. In reality, you likely do not eat some great variety of foods. Fundamentally it is the same 2-4 meats (sorry vegans), bread, and some veggies. So I started by filling a large glass casserole pan with green beans, broccoli, and cauliflower, a second pan I fill with corn on the cob, a third I do a bed of sliced onion and a meat on top with seasoning, and I finally have a covered glass bowl for cooking two cups of rice. I eat this steamed rice for 2 days before making homemade fried rice. Well made fried rice will easily last the remainder of 2 weeks. The meal is mostly rice, with some veggies and a few ounces of meat. This is my only full meal each day. I cook that on whatever my oven calls 450° F for 1 h 20m. It does not require any oil or anything else. While it is edible like this, the last trick is to make a sauce with half a jar of mayo, about a quarter of the jar filled with the best teriyaki sauce you can find, and a small amount of sriracha sauce to taste. This sauce can be further improved slightly with any small amounts of savory sauces from pickling or fermentation or in more simple terms, the juices from a jar of whole olives, peppers, old alcohol, left over pan glazing stock, etc., or like Worcestershire or soy sauce if you have trouble with these abstractions.
Form a boring baseline of food, then start tuning this baseline to make it better over time. If you limit yourself to this kind of repetition, you’ll eat much more consistently healthy, but also you’ll really learn how to cook using abstracted information and a deeper understanding of your available tools.
I do this with everything. I occasionally make some cookies that just go in the oven. The whole preheating your oven thing is just an attempt to make recipes transferable. The controls on your oven are likely way off and the control algorithm or temperature switches are extremely inconsistent. People do not make these appliance purchases in general while shopping for these features. Therefore these corners are cut in most hardware. I just ate the same cookies enough to know exactly how long they cook for with my favorite properties. I cook them for 22 minutes at 475° F from a cold start. I can put that on a start and end timer and have hot cookies any time I want. If there is a high probability that I will not be present or available when they are done, 20 minutes at 450 will produce good results if they remain in the oven as it cools down.
Using the timers means you can never forget something in a way that is catastrophic. I don’t recommended running an oven unsupervised, but you can take precautions to enable failsafes like pan under pan setups.
It sounds like you may have obsessive compulsive disorder. I would encourage you to seek out a therapist who utilizes exposure and response prevention (ERP) as a treatment.
