Binary morality system where you can only choose between being a normal person or a mass murdering psychopath. Then your decision has no consequences.
Dialogue system that gives you 3+ options which change literally nothing
Oh, Bethesda is in this?
No feedback when hitting enemies, besides generic blood splashing and maybe a stumble
Way more health than is necessary or interesting on enemies
Combat system is mindless and boring
Quests are full of “go to this cookie-cutter dungeon, clear it out and bring me the MacGuffin at the end” on loop.
The game has lots of bugs that were in the previous 2 games, and were patched in the fan-patches of both the previous 2 games.
And yet I still see people posting Skyrim screenshots and praising it… What a mediocre p.o.s.
Enemies leap directly at your camera while screeching like howler monkeys.
> Yes
> Sarcastic yes
> Reluctant yes
> No
All dialogue options have previews that are nothing like what you actually say (Looking at you Cyberpunk) so you try to apologise for someones loss but the actual dialogue is your character being an utter piece of shit without warning. Getting the true ending and several important pieces of gear require you to never be mean to multiple NPCs.
NPC: My husband was killed!
1: Sorry for your loss…
2: It’s about time!1: pfft sorry for your loss 🙄 tell someone who cares 🥱
2: It’s about time we found the MF who did this! Let’s go hunt him down!
Reminds me at the start of witcher 3 my brother was playing and some thugs come annoy you, one option was something like ‘I disagree’ which sounds reasonable, so he picked it. That option has Gerald insulting them and jumping straight into a fight, shit escalated fucking quickly lol
Do you want to die?
A. No
B. No way
C. Definitely notAnd one randomly answers “yes” and you need to restart from a save.
Or even worse, there’s an entire gradient, but what they actually bothered to put in the middle is boring and pointless.
Or there’s a viable third option, but it got scrapped 10 minutes before launch and all the text is at complete odds to the dialogue
Or just all bad choices.
Or the tone of the actual responses doesn’t match the text for the selection of the responses.
“Do you accept the mission?”
- Yes
- No, thanks
- Maybe…
Option 3 actually declares war on quest giver.
Oh and one that just happened to me last night:
Your normal actions still work during dialog so if you press buttons to try to exit out of a dialog, you might accidentally attack the NPC you’re talking to. If you let them kill you, they are still hostile when you return. Need to start a new save to recover. At least they drop the unique key from their shop when you kill them (Dark Souls 1, hopefully it’s no big deal that I had to kill the blacksmith. At least I don’t have to listen to the pounding metal when I spawn above him anymore).
Every single shelf, cupboard, sack, discolored patch of dirt, hollow tree, etc. Is lootable. 99.9% of the loot is useless. The remaining 0.1% is key to solving several quests and/or the best stuff in the game.
Oh my wife would love this game, that’s basically all she likes to do in games. Someone needs to just make thief simulator for her.
That’s just an Elder Scrolls game, and I love it, for some reason.
This did not bother me at all in Skyrim honestly.
Equipment can be upgraded, but only through an enormous amount of tedious grind for tiny incremental improvements.
By halfway through the upgrade tree, all the equipment is overpowered and will make any boss fight trivial, including the final boss of the game. All additional upgrades are meaningless.
You don’t get to see the real ending unless you fully upgrade all the equipment.
Upgrading the equipment has a chance to fail and waste all your resources. The chance to fail increases with every level.
Bonus points: Failing destroys the equipment and you need to start over from scratch.
Wait but I actually like this (without the bonus points part)
(I do have a system somewhat like that in a game I’m working on in my free time lol)
There are also four normal endings and a true ending. You can only see the true ending after getting all four normal endings. There are multiple branch points in the story leading to the different endings so you have to start almost from the beginning to find a new one. The true ending is on a wholly separate route that is 99% identical to the one leading to Ending A. There is no new game plus, so you have to start from scratch each time. The true ending boss, unlike the other ending bosses, is absurdly over tuned and the only enemy in the game that requires you use or even know about several obscure mechanics, and even then requires you to have all upgrades maxed out and be near the level cap to even stand a chance.
Pointless inventory management and crafting.
Driving mechanic where you steer where you look, making it impossible to drive straight while looking around or behind you.
Halo’s gameplay is really not that great (I’d even say pretty bad) without the nostalgia goggles.
I disagree. I’d rather have look-to-steer then the full-left-straight-full-right steering that’s in other fps games. Not being able to make slight changes to direction and speed in Half-Life 2 vehicles always made them frustrating.
Even the original Duke controller had two analog sticks and two analog triggers. Mapping two independent actions (camera movement and steering) to the same input was already bad in Halo CE, but it was downright criminal in Halo 2 and later games that started to include massive backdrop setpieces. You can either look at the Covenant spaceship glassing the city or steer your warthog, but not both. It’s asinine.
I’m not looking at the landscapes while in a firefight. That’s why the game designers give you moments of pause. Like when you exited the cave in Halo 4 or the very beginning of HL Episode 2.
I’ve never had any problems with Halo’s controls.
It can still be relevant in combat when you want to look around to see where your enemies are or find the exit or something.
The endless fan-boat segment is the worst part of the game, for me at least. Physics are fucked, puzzles to progress are forced as hell. I was so happy when it was over.
It’s not like those physics puzzles were hard. How many variations of the SeeSaw puzzle were there?
GabeN: In Episode 2, we’ll have the biggest puzzle in a Half Life game to data!
Episode 2: It’s just a huge seesaw puzzle.
I just got triggered
Don’t forget a save point right before the unskippable cutscene and overly difficult boss fight, so you get to watch it over again every time you die.
I still have the “Kairi’s inside me” cutscene from Kingdom Hearts memorized. It has been like two decades since I first played that game, but that cutscene was right before the most difficult story boss in the game.
You guys are forgetting an annoying encumberance system where in order to pick up the heavy object (example: plate mail) you have to drop a light weight object (example: ring) because you are out of item slots.
Worse: Both encumbrance and grid inventory management. Can’t pick up that plate armor because you need to re-Tetris your inventory around to make room for the 4x6 plate armor icon. And no, you can’t rotate items to make the armor a 6x4 instead.
And after you organize your entire inventory to fit the armor, you still can’t pick it up because it’s too heavy.
- Lonely? Don’t worry, the main character is never going to shut up and will comment on every single thing with lines that won’t get old at all.
- Yeah, you can play with your friend… After hours of gameplay, once you both have this super special item and only for certain, boring ass missions.
- You need an account, and we have no native sign up so we’re going to open up a completely different window while you try to drag your mouse awkwardly with the controller. Yes, the cancel button is very close to the confirm, no there’s no confirmation, and yes you’ll have to start this shit from scratch.
- Escort missions, but the escort won’t get out of the fucking way, and your shots can kill them.
- Currency systems that are just currencies within currencies, within currencies.
- The items are easy enough to see, but you have to be in just the right location to pick it up.
- There’s a save screen, but nothing actually pauses.
- I know 99% of games use similar buttons for different functions, but what if we switch it up, just for giggles? Let’s make “jump” the R1 button!
- You can drive, but it’s on ice physics. And, yes, there will be a chase sequence that’s going to take you a very, very long time.
The chase sequence starts with an unskippable cinematic, has no checkpoints, and will force you to rewatch the cinematic every time you fail.
There’s other traffic in the chase sequence, but the traffic is randomized every time, so there’s no way to memorize any pattern.
The mission fails if the target gets too far away.
Any time you bump into anything, it slows you down enough that the target gets too far away.This is also the first time you’ve driven a car in the game.
A currency system where the game has a normal currency that you can earn via tasks but that currency is artificially nerfed because there is an additional “premium” currency that is only available either in extremely paltry amounts that have to be saved over months of grinding or spending actual cash. Also there’s a ton of stuff that can only be purchased with large amounts of premium currency
A subscription for basic services like multiplayer or a song catalog even though you just paid $70 for the game
High paced action game that suddenly grinds to a halt for a forced stealth section that was clearly tacked on and poorly designed
Inventory expansions of the extremely tiny default inventory cost premium currency per month.
-
Escort Section where the person you’re escorting moves at a slower pace than you do, forcing you to jog, walk, jog all the time.
-
Want to quit the game? Sure go into the menu, click Quit Session -> Are you sure? -> click Yes -> Loading Screen -> Game menu -> click Quit Game -> Are you sure? -> click Yes -> Loading Screen -> Unskippable game title intro -> sub menu with Quit Game, Continue Game, New Game -> click Quit Game -> Are you sure? -> click Yes -> Loading Screen -> Desktop
-
> escort mission with walk-and-talk exposition dump
> keep close to the escort target or the radio will yell at you
> faster than walking
> slower than runningNeed an account to begin the game even though it’s single player.
After logging in the game updates and requires a restart. Even though you updated outside of the game.
The menu is a convoluted mess with lots of areas all having notification icons.
Lots of DLC with adverts for the DLC menu.
And of course you need to be always online with that account even though it is single player and all game data is already available locally.
UI is 30 different sections that are marked with obscure pictures instead of words.
Every mission is like this one from GTA:VC. Easy to fail, frustrating controls, annoying camera, long, unskippable intro and you can’t save during it. Add minute-long loading times and it’s perfect.
Don’t forget to never fix game breaking bugs.
30min of gameplay, more purchasable with expensive unbalanced DLC’s.
Loot boxes. Because a game is not addictive enough to kids without gambling.
Worst storyline, unrealistic characters.
Add more useless content, like new skins and hats, instead of fixing bugs.
Change mechanics every now and than causing loads of players to loose everything or making expensive purchased items useless.
Make the game subscription based after 6 months, when everyone already bought the base game and extra content, and aren’t eligible for refunds anymore.
Make the game pay to win.
Ask EA to publish your game.
Make travel time waaaay to long, no fast travel.
Have way too many collectibles in places which are easy to reach but take a looooong time to get to, with at least 1 per set glitched somewhere impossible to reach.
Did I already say “more DLC’s”?
Make multi-player server based, have those servers crash often.
Abandon the project while there’s still a massive player base because you’re working on the next money-grab piece of junk.
Complain constantly the people leaving bad reviews are just too dumb to understand the concept.
Don’t forget to never fix game breaking bugs.
Combined with a single save only mechanic so if you encounter the bug even if it doesn’t lead to a crash there is a good chance you have to start over from scratch because your last save game before the bug has been overwritten.
That’s a good one.
I also forgot to add it should have a veeeeery slow and long intro, so the actual horrors of the game should start after 2h of running the game so people aren’t eligible for a refund anymore.
Even Fromsoft managed to do this by placing geometry wrong. If you can’t get out, can’t get killed, and don’t have any ‘reset to last bonfire’ option… this is where you live now.











