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I would’ve settled for razor blades. No, I get apples instead. That’s not candy.
Apples > Raisins && Toothbrushes.
If I open my door Thursday night and go to put candy in someone’s bag and see a toothbrush, I’m giving them a second handful of candy.
I’m in a predicament.
One the one hand, you’re doing God’s work.
On the other hand, I’m an anti-theist, so the previous sentence means shit.
What do?
I want to offer you a new superpower.
When I say, “bless you,” when someone sneezes, if someone asks me, “You aren’t religious! Who are you asking to bless me?” I answer;
“No one. I’m the one blessing you.”
So I guess, this time, you could say, “You’re doing a good thing.”
I like it.