• HootinNHollerin@lemmy.world
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    7 days ago

    Be me

    Liberal uncle in conservative/ trump family

    Fly to red state for family member’s funeral

    Get made fun of by all family members in public at the funeral reception

    • Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
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      8 days ago

      My grandma never met you. She lived to be 103, and died last October (2023).

      My grandma loved you. She wanted you to do well, and be happy. Just as she did with everyone on earth. It’s physically impossible for her to host a dinner big enough to feed everyone on earth. But the logistical impossibility is the only reason she didn’t do it.

      My cousin is a lesbian. She had been married to a decent man, had two kids. Good family man. Married for nearly 10 years before she discovered she was lesbian. The breakup was civil. He did nothing wrong. They both still loved each other, and loved the kids. He was still welcome at the table, as was my cousins new partner. My cousins mom was NOT accepting. When my aunt tried making a scene, my grandma said “Melinda…I won’t have hate at this table. You love your daughter. I don’t ask you to agree with your daughters lifestyle. But I do ask you do not bring hate into my home.”

      My grandma was a teacher in her 20s. She lived in a small but growing suburb, and essentially raised the whole town. She got promoted several times as the years went on. Eventually being the district superintendant. She LITERALLY was responsible for raising thousands of kids, who were everywhere from the boomer generation to the millenials.

      She had a simple philosophy. Which was that she loved you. She would put aside the world to hear what you had to say. My grandpa used to joke that when WWII broke out, she was having tea with the neighbors and helping raise their kids. Just discussing the day. Choas and war breaking out across the globe, but she was determined to hear about you. And for the kids, she would teach them that everybody was different, and we need to love everybody for who they are. Not who you want them to be.

      And she loved everyone. Even you. Even though she never met you. She always said “Everyone is welcome in this home, as long as they take off their hat at the dinner table, leave hate out of their hearts, and tell me about their day.”

      The only time I ever remember her saying anything negative, was somebody had said during trumps first term something he was doing in office.

      Her reply was “I just do not like that man.”

      AIRHORNS!!!

      I know that sounds so non-aggressive, but for her to say she didn’t like someone would be like a world leader declairing WWIII. The room literally went quiet.

      So I try to live my life to keep making Gram proud. Accept everyone, even if you disagree with them. You can’t just accept those you get along with, and not create an echo chamber.

      So if you’re ever in Cleveland, you can have a meal with me. And maybe when you fly out of state to be with family, you can teach them about letting the hate go.