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  • UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml
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    1 month ago

    Every day I go to all my part time jobs, and they take so much from me that I cannot recover what I’ve lost before the beginning of my next day of shifts.

    Every day, I lose more and more of me. Until one day, there will be nothing left and I will quit one or all of my jobs and be unable to afford housing, and become homeless (again).

    • Miss Millie@lemmy.mlOP
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      1 month ago

      Try to stay away from stress reasons for a while if possible , hope you get better soon

    • UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml
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      1 month ago

      Ever try psychedelics? I fully understand they aren’t for everyone, but it helped me get away from the autopilot feeling in life.

      Unfortunately, most days I wish I could go back to autopilot. Being aware and present can be a curse.

    • Miss Millie@lemmy.mlOP
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      1 month ago

      That’s good to know… I have the same feelings whenever I go back home from college… like college is good but nothing is cozier or nicer than being able to rest after a busy day

  • Rayquetzalcoatl@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    Sad, sometimes, and a little lonely most of the time. Been through a rough breakup this year. But getting better all the time! Hope you’re well!

    • tetris11@lemmy.ml
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      1 month ago

      Last night I had a mild panic attack for no reason. I think it might have been induced by a mixture of beer and sugar, a combination I don’t do very often.

      I’ve just come out of a long term relationship with someone I thought I would have kids with. She was the best thing that ever happened to me, but somehow that wasn’t enough for me and I wanted out. I still have no idea if I did the right thing, but at least we left as friends who care deeply for each other. The separation was slow and excrutiating but I think we’re both on the road to healing.

      I used to think that if two people love each other, that was enough, but I’ve come to realize than I wanted more than just love, I wanted to feel less lonely in my head, and a severe language barrier was preventing that from happening. With time, we might have gotten there, but with time, I also may have grown to resent her, and so that’s why I ended it. I banked on my pessimism instead of my optimism.

      Time heals all, and I guess we’ve just got to tread water until that time comes. Sorry for the word vomit above, your post apparently struck a chord with me

      • Rayquetzalcoatl@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        Heya man, thanks for sharing. I hope you’re doing okay. That sounds tough, and it’s a hard realisation that love isn’t always enough on its own - relationships take work outside of love, and that has certainly felt like a disheartening realisation for me. It feels the world is a little less magic now, but that’s okay - there are better things coming for us both, that we will be better equipped to handle correctly with what we’ve learned from this. Happy Monday!

        • tetris11@lemmy.ml
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          1 month ago

          Thank you for these kind words, and I hope you heal too or at least find that magic again somewhere.

      • Rayquetzalcoatl@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        Thanks! I actually did consider it but my landlady won’t allow pets, and if I’m honest I both can’t afford and am too disorganised to take good care of something living. Good suggestion, tho!

    • Miss Millie@lemmy.mlOP
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      1 month ago

      That’s annoying… just the thought of catching a cold is annoying to me : headaches, constant sneezing, heat and such things … I hope you get better soon

  • eskimofry@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    I feel terrible because I didn’t buy even a card for my wife’s birthday. I just took her to her mother’s house. This was two weeks ago. I am still baffled why I didn’t buy flowers or something. My wife isn’t demanding at all.

  • Sam_Bass@lemmy.ml
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    1 month ago

    exhausted. physically and mentally. even if i manage to disconnect its never for long enough to recouperate fully