Edit: “getting closer to marriage” is about the whole journey starting from being completely single

Edit: if this shower thought is too confusing to be useful to you, then here is a quote that gives some of the same guidance, is simpler, less philosophical, but less broad: “Don’t waste your time chasing butterflies. Mend your garden, and the butterflies will come” - Mario Quintana

    • dullbananas@lemmy.caOP
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      5 months ago

      Properly moving closer to your full potential is how to get a girlfriend. Properly getting a girlfriend and moving closer to family life overall is a way to move closer to your full potential (in other words, living fully). They are the same actions The same actions constitute both.

      Edit: should have said “overall mindset” instead of “actions”

      • MrJameGumb@lemmy.world
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        5 months ago

        You seem to have a very narrow view of what life can offer. There’s much more to life than just getting married and pumping out babies. That may be one person’s idea of “living fully” but it’s hardly applicable to every person in every scenario

        • dullbananas@lemmy.caOP
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          5 months ago

          The narrow view you’re talking about is bad for success in dating, so it’s not what I’m talking about. I’m talking about things like working on yourself, having your own life, being an interesting person, becoming more confident, etc.

          • MrJameGumb@lemmy.world
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            5 months ago

            working on yourself, having your own life, being an interesting person, becoming more confident

            These are all things you can do when you’re single. Likewise there are plenty of married people with families who never accomplish these goals. Your need to connect everything to this arbitrary end goal of “starting a family” is what doesn’t make any sense. You keep trying to make an objective concrete declaration about things that are entirely subjective and really have no specific “correct” answer.

            • dullbananas@lemmy.caOP
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              5 months ago

              My idea might make more sense if you don’t think of it as being connected to intentions. Also, it fails to describe what comes after marriage is reached.

              With that being said, I am not totally certain of how true my idea is.