Huh, that explains the 4B movement in S. Korea.

Yuru Camp! Just cute girls cooking and camping.

I guess T. Kingfisher’s Saint of Steel series. It may not hit the “fucking brutal” mark but it does cover a lot of dark themes like loss very well for a fantasy, also not afraid to get racy. I enjoy T. Kingfisher as an author so I highly recommend.

I’m terribly sorry for your loss of mental health. Getting the vile shit of the internet directed art you as an adult is awful, can’t imagine how tough it is for a 16y/o.

Have you considered checking out your local Community College?