Except, as they’ve learned, they didn’t actually have a theft problem. That was a lie to disguise low sales numbers. It’s no better or worse than it’s always been.

The real issue is and remains, the relentless pursuit of number must always go up.

The problem is locking up the item.

I’m not gonna fuckin steal it, don’t treat me like I will.

Notably, those stores fell out of fashion pretty quickly when someone decided to just throw stuff out on shelves and have people get it themselves.

I’m not asking a clerk to get me shit. I can either find it quickly and get it myself or I’m getting it elsewhere.

He was 24 when Grease was made.

The guy next to him is Michael Tucci, who was 32 at the time.

Luke Perry at the beginning of 90210 was the same age as Travolta. Then later on the same age is Tucci in the same series.

In that last one, you’d probably be able to see the bent over tip with the naked eye. You’d certainly be able to feel it if you ran your finger over it. It would take some force and would be pretty painful to use.

I think you’ll find more people who don’t even know what an operating system is than people who know enough about computers to identify windows as a problem.

From someone who eats almost no bread anymore:

It’s the bread.

You’re not going to sit and eat a spoonful of jelly like a fucking goblin, but you might eat a piece of plain bread and be happy about it. Especially if it’s a perfectly cooked dinner roll.

is THAT what that was about?

I only ever watched the first half of the TV movie. Second half never really seemed to air, or it really failed to explain anything.

I only stopped with carbs because my doctor recommended I do so because I was likely to become diabetic if I didn’t. The weight loss was a result of that.

LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT HOW CARBS ARE BAD FOR YOU THO

I am truly, truly sorry to every person who ever said to me “hey man you lost some weight what you doin keto?” And I didn’t just say “yeah basically” and let it end there. I just… I’m really, really excited about it.

Those aren’t croissants. Those are crescents.

I was going to make a joke, spelling it the same way and pronouncing it differently, but I’m pretty sure the Pillsbury tubes are even called crescents on the package

I was gonna bitch about it too but the cheaper Bosch ranges use the same knobs. It’s an off the shelf part that Bosch is charging a ridiculous premium for.

They can hang by their toes

Ope we got em. Found him guys we found the horny one guys.

That’s why I put it in my protein shakes

Trump has no idea why he wants Greenland. Someone close to him is feeding him ideas, while feeding his ego.

Greenland is set to become an economic producer in the future, but we have maybe a century before that even starts. I gotta think you’re right, Greenland is a distraction from all the other bullshit. Keep them talking and no one will notice the really evil shit

I went to American public School.

I speak precisely one language, with maybe a passing interest in a few others. My wife doesn’t even have that. Her job requires her to be able to communicate effectively. So that limits us to English speaking countries, Canada, the UK, Ireland, New Zealand and Australia. Of those, New Zealand and Ireland are tempting, though our careers aren’t in high demand in either location.

Emigrating to a country we’d buy be interested in would be expensive and time consuming, and we have neither the time nor the money to accomplish that. Not to mention our families and friends are all here. We both have decent careers here.

Eh you’d be fine. Doesn’t really matter who’s in the white house if you’re just visiting. The president has very little actual impact on day to day life. Who’s in the white house is a symptom of the health of a country, not a cause of it. And, like herpes, one symptom may subside but the country is still infected.

What I’m saying is, if you wouldn’t visit under trump, maybe reconsider visiting at all. Though I maintain that as a visitor you’d find the people you meet to be mostly polite and even kind, if maybe a little extra interested in you because you have an accent.

Definitely don’t fucking move here though holy shit what an awful mistake that would be. In fact, if you ever do visit take me back with you. I’m cool, I’m handy, I make a mean chili. My wife loves to garden you’d basically have no chores!

Commit a non violent felony that doesn’t step in to federal jurisdiction. Hire a good lawyer that can convince a judge to let you continue under your own recognizance working while you’re living in jail awaiting trial. Every time you’re trial date approaches push for an extension or a delay. Enjoy living in the premium cell at the zoo.

Trump thinks a coat of arms is a jacket made of weapons that he can buy