Naja Kaouthia

I definitely need to get a new car. I’ve kept mine running as well as I could and it’s almost old enough to vote but it’s reaching the end of its life. I’d do without one if I could but it’s a necessity and I try to drive as little as possible. I always go Subaru so that’s an import and I’m sure if I wait it’ll be wholly unaffordable. I need to replace some of my electronics repair kit so I can fix what I have when possible.

The closing credits for ALF.

I’m going to get incredibly baked and play Minecraft. Then bed.

Washington DC. Aside from the obvious, just trying to drive into DC makes you think that perhaps you could get off on a technicality or plead insanity.

Thank fucking Christ he’s old and will be dead soon. That’s all I’m holding onto right now.

Well I haven’t experienced this level of disappointment since childhood.

There’s no goddamn way anyone let them on an international flight without a valid US passport.

Why in the hell is it always toilet paper?

That’s a fair assessment. However, I personally, am at my limit of awful things I’m able to carry around with me currently. Best I can muster is a “fuck this silly hat wearing asshole” at present.

Ah well good thing I don’t particularly give a shit what some guy in an (admittedly) awesome party hat thinks about me, as a vagina owner.

I refer to him as, “Voldemort lookin’ motherfucker”

I didn’t realize Siri and the cats were conspiring. Yesterday I went into the living room to investigate a ruckus and found one of my cats sitting on the couch while the home pod in the window sill was playing Mumford and Sons.

I offset the gains from my one cup of coffee by chasing it with a sugar free Monster. Balance.

That, uh, was definitely a hard ‘r’ there. Jesus Christ.

I regret to inform them that that’s not how that works.

My sister in law and I got a package of Star Wars Oreo cookies and went through the package to see all the characters on said cookies. We had a blast because we’re a couple of joyful dorks. This guy gets it.

Pictured: The moment everything went off the fucking rails. (2016, colorized)