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Cake day: August 1st, 2023

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  • The Cabinet list so far, as it was officially leaked moments ago on NudeAfrica.com:

    State - Matt Gaetz

    Treasury - Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino

    Interior - A t-shirt cannon

    Justice - DraftKings®

    Agriculture - owner of that McDonald’s

    Commerce - currently accepting bids

    Labor - Immortan Joe

    Defense - Vladimir Putin

    Housing and Urban Development - it’s Trump, so probably Herschel Walker, ffs

    Transportation - Elon Musk’s twitter account

    Energy - V. Putin

    Health and Human Services - sold off and privatized between Nestlé, Saudi Aramco, and Ticketmaster

    Education - Kid Rock, Marjorie Taylor-Greene, and Lauren Boebert, and all sewn together as a human centipede

    Veterans’ Affairs - Captain Morgan; under secretaries Jack Daniels and Jim Beam

    Homeland Security - Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman, once the check clears

















  • Working from the definition of sociopathy, I think you could substitute “AI” in a few spots and end up with a nearly equally-accurate definition of AI:

    A sociopath is someone with antisocial personality disorder (ASPD), a mental health condition that involves a lack of regard for others’ feelings and rights. People with ASPD may: Lack empathy and remorse Manipulate others for personal gain Behave impulsively or aggressively Break rules or laws Feel little guilt for harming others Seem charming at first Have difficulty understanding others’ feelings