Last september everything came to a head and due to my failing mental health I tried to commit. It failed and I’ve been off work ever since.

Next June will be my 10 year anniversary with this company. I thought I was, well, not “liked” but at least somewhere above just “tolerated”.

Well, that’s one fantasy out if this world.

I probably will be fired because of my prolonged absence. I used to dread that option, but now I welcome it.

For a decade I felt unheard & unseen and when I spoke up about it, people convinced me it was all just in my head.

But it isn’t. I really am as loathed as I feared I would be.

Then again, I loathe myself most of all, so I “understand” the situation.

I wouldn’t reach out either if the roles were reversed.