Hardly a defense for grovelling.

Calm down grandpa, your blood pressure can’t take it.

When you’re talking about actionable threats, I.E. real world violence, but want to appear only hypothetical, the meme is, “I’d kill X in Minecraft.”.

It’ll do that sometimes.

This guy really thinks he’s never gonna die. I’ll be surprised if he survives this upcoming term, and not even from a Minecraft related cause, just poor health.

Well she’s dead now unfortunately.

Naw, egg is just a selfish lover.

So the egg really did come first.

Isn’t there a character limit on shitter?

Sighs, and begrudgingly resets a counter labeled, “Days Since I’ve thought about Martin Shkreli.” Then, I place my head in my hands and begin to weep.

I’ve heard similar things about C-sections.

The train doesn’t exist, therefore it can’t be late when it’ll never be there.

On the plus side the train is never late.

I enjoy this idea immensely.

I take it all back. They’re for sure just hucking shit out the back of the truck to make a big dumb pile for shit stain to wack off in front of.

Sign

I just…I don’t…

My only real hope for this world is that everyone will get what they deserve.

Typically when you’re clearing debris, you pile into one central location so it can get loaded into trucks and hauled off. I’m sure ole Meat Ball Ron wanted a dramatic backdrop. More than one thing can be true.

“Authorities said that the lift operator at the top of the shaft noticed there was a problem with the elevator when 11 people were riding it. After they were brought back to the main level, authorities realized that Weier was killed and four other adults injured, the Gazette reported.”

Whoever wrote this should be beaten around the head with a grammar textbook, and the editor too.

Why does your robot vacuum need a camera feed, and speakers? Who thought that was a good idea? I truly loathe the future.

It’d be great if this was reported on while it was happening, instead of being sat on to get a juicy book deal.

Terrifyingly specific.