Anyone want to start a company. Work from home. We’ll split profits among ourselves. We can. Build blackjack lottery machines and webhookers

That’s a horribly deceiving title. They just stayed remote and made themselves ineligible for promotion.

Business Insider claims it has seen internal Dell tracking data that reveals nearly 50 percent of the workforce opted to accept the consequences of staying remote, undermining Dell’s plan to restore its in-office culture.

Dell announced a new return-to-office initiative earlier this year. In the new plan, workers had to classify themselves as remote or hybrid.

Those who classified themselves as hybrid are subject to a tracking system that ensures they are in a physical office 39 days a quarter, which works out to close to three days per work week.

Alternatively, by classifying themselves as remote, workers agree they can no longer be promoted or hired into new roles within the company.

Holy corporate oppression, Batman! That’s a shitty deal no matter which option you choose.

I’m glad they’ve got themselves into a sticky situation.

Also, this observation was funny (in a sad way):

One person said they’d spoken with colleagues who had chosen to go hybrid, and those colleagues reported doing work in mostly empty offices punctuated with video calls with people who were in other mostly empty offices.

This would be a handy way to get rid of half your staff, but the people you chase away are usually the ones you want to keep. As per the Dead-Sea Effect, the ones who will leave are the ones who generally are more able to, who will be your most employable people, and thus your most talented. Usually.

Making work suck, and letting the best half of the staff bail, seems like stupid and a game show.

They work in tech, promotions are achieved by moving employers. Internal mobility is always terrible in tech companies.