Ooh, yes ape daddy! Pound my monkussy!

So, hell has education, the best music, strippers, drugs, all the cool people, orgies etc. Heaven has boring ignorant church people who find hetero sexuality more important then the love for their own child. So why would I want to go to heaven instead of hell? Christians aren’t presenting a strong case here. When you’re making shit up, why not create a heaven which is awesome instead? With our Holy Noodle, the Flying Spaghetti Monster, heaven consists of beer volcanoes and strippers. Hell consists of beer volcanoes and strippers too, but the beer is passed its expired date and the strippers have STD’s. This is how you promote your fictional afterlife, like it’s better then the alternative. I’d rather go to a place with hot strippers and cocain instead of a heaven full of unvaccinated babies and child molesters.

I loooooove Chick tracts. I collect them.

Always on the lookout for Lisa in which the family doctor lets a dad know that he gave his own daughter herpes but it’s okay because he helps the dad find Jesus and stop being a rapist. That one got pulled pretty quickly.